aisshhh.

i'm not feeling well since last friday. badan rasa sejuk panas especially bila malam menjelma.*ceh macam vampire pulak.

previously sejak duduk KK1 ni memang jarang guna selimut bila tidur sebab panas.tapi beberapa hari ni asyik berselubung dengan selimut.sejukkk~

maybe its because i'm too tired. every days filled with lecture and tutorial. plus intensive training for debate until late night. went out for programs during weekend, sometime weekdays too. during night, i have to complete lsp tasks and also update for upcoming programs. usually will sleep around 2 to 3 am. wake up around 6 in the morning.

somehow i feel having a tonnes of works is not a big problems. I can still enjoy myself. how? i dont know. but i feel satisfied when i've completed any task with the best effort for it.

but...

there's one day when i bumped into my friend and she asked me where did i went for previous days coz she rarely saw me at my room. as usual i said, went to training and have task to do. then she consult me to give time for myself. dont be too workaholic.

hah? i'm wondering. so for all this while i'm not having my own self-time? dushhhhhh.*aku tak sedar pun perkara ni.tapi macam betul jugak.

tiba-tiba aku terfikir, macam mana nak bagi masa untuk diri aku sendiri? haha. maksudnya aku kena couple ke? *macam mana la aku boleh terfikir soalan ni.hehe.tapi ada rasionalnya kenapa soalan ni yang keluar kot.mungkin sebab most of my friends dah ada bf/gf or bf/gf-to-be or even bf/gf-in-a-list. jadi ada masa yang dorang peruntukkan untuk keluar or makan or talking or etc. dan bila aku takda sebab tu aku seolah-olah takda social life kot.haha.kot eaaa, so ini semua assumption semata-mata.

jadi aku kena couple ke? hahahahaha. giler la. problem-solution betul. tak pasal-pasal nanti bukan cari masa untuk diri sendiri tapi buang masa untuk diri sendiri. nak text la. nak call la.nak jumpa la.aishhhhhhhhh. tak kuasa aku.ayoooo.memang sah aku takda masa untuk diri sendiri kalau macam tu.

heyyy...i'm not trying to say yang aku ni anti-lelaki *as what my cousins claimed me as that type of person* cuma it's not the right time yet. it's not easy to choose the right person tho. i've my own list of chriteria.its a loooonggg list! haha*again, my friends said that i'm too selective*hahaha. of course we've to be selective friend, u'r choosing for ur future and it has a long-term effects.not just for one day relationship within a short-term period. so being choosy, the pros surely will outweight the cons.

ok, this is my verse of love. *tiba-tiba aku jadi jiwang cakap pasal benda ni apa kejadah.haha.nvm, cut the crap, i'l share with you guys about my thought which is actually hard for me to talk about.haha

love is a very important things in life. for me, i can't just simply say i love you or even i like you to any person that i wish to tell to. why? because every time i started to like someone, i'l definitely do my check and balances.in terms of what? in many things, plus to committ into relationship i've to be prepared physically and mentally.i'l try to picture myself with that person in the future. sometimes i feel, yes he's the right person.somehow i feel, oh no,i can't. finally i decided to conclude that i'l never ever tell him about my feelings. because i believe in the future, as time goes by, the right person will come into my life. who? i don't know. lets give it to Allah, the Almighty. He knows the best.

p/s 1 : noted "that person" is not referring to anyone.

p/s 2 : haha. i dont believe that i wrote all this crappy things and posted it.shame~

p/s 3: ok, sebab nak bagi masa untuk diri sendiri saya kini sedang lepak dalam bilik tv sambil online dan ini pertama kali saya menjejakkan kaki ke bilik tv ini sepanjang saya tinggal di kolej kediaman ini.haha

p/s 4 : ini mesti sebab pengaruh aku tengok al-kuliyyah tajuk "pecahkan ruyung" tapi dorang berbicara pasal bagaimana membina keluarga yang unggul.sebab tu aku punya cerita tiba2 lari tajuk.haha

those fish live happily ever after although they are not in the water but in a car.haha